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Missing him. [28 Jan 2007|07:55pm]
[ mood | sad ]

As most of you know, my brother, Zachary, passed away January 20th, from leukemia. I am so thankful I got home to see him alert & all before he left us. But I must say this is the hardest thing I've ever been through. I can't even begin to describe the emotional pain I've been in. I know he is in a better place, in no more pain or suffering, but it still hurts more than anything. It's so hard to fathom life without him, as my family centered everything around him, & I liked it that way. I loved him so much & was so close to him. He truly was & is my inspiration. He had set-backs his entire life, but he never let that stand in his way, he never cried or complained. I didn't even realize how many lives he had touched- at his wake he had more than 450 people, & I was told over & over how much Zack impacted them. I know I'm strong & will be fine, but I think it's going to take awhile. 

The article about him in my town's paper.

3 love me?

pleasssse [26 Dec 2006|10:16am]
Hey Guys! I hope everyone had an awesome Christmas/Holidays. My family was definitely blessed. 

Anyway, I have a favor to ask, can anyone pick me up at the Tampa airport Sunday, Jan. 7th at 4:45pm? It would be greatly appreciated.. thanks!
2 love me?

favorrr [06 Dec 2006|01:09pm]
Hey guys.. I have a favor- can anyone bring me to the airport on Sat. Dec. 16 @ like 6:30am [for an 8am flight]? I know it's like crazy early, so if no one can I'll probably just take the Tampa Bay Shuttle, but I thought I'd try asking first. Thanks. 

Oh and hope everyone is doing well on their finals =)
1 love me?

dealing w. life's obstacles =/ [31 Jul 2006|08:53pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]

I was almost ready to go back to school for what I knew what would be an amazing semester. And now here I am a week later & everything has changed. I know many of you already know, but for those of you who don't, I found out I had two of my fibroma's (what tumors are called in the disease  I have) that are in my spinal cord, grow. Thus, I need to undergo two major operations, one to get these growths out & another to fix the curve that has formed in my upper-back/neck from the previous operation. This resuting in me basically not being able to take any classroom classes in the fall- putting me a year behind w. my major. 

At first the whole thing crushed me. I know most people don't like school, but I love it, I was so excited to finally start classes that pretain to my major. I was also beyond excited to be Prez of my frat.  But I realize it's pointless to feel sorry for myself, that I have to accept what happens, & look for the positives in the situation. For one thing my neck will be fixed, so finally it will look normal & it won't bother my back anymore. Also, I will be here to go to Cali w. my fam in the fall & other events that I would partly or totally miss. Don't get me wrong, I still feel like crying a lot, knowing how much I will miss school-my bf-and friends, but I'll live. 

I'm going down to  FL with my Mom before my operations (Aug. 9th thru the 15th) so if any or all of you USFers would like to maybe go out to dinner or something one night, I would enjoy it very much so. 

Also, what online classes has everyone taking? I've fulfilled all but one Gorden Rule req... so I'm just looking for any online classes that won't be too stressful as I'm busy recovering, & can keep me some what entertained. Any suggestions would be great. thx.

Anyway, hope everyone is enjoying the heat.. it's like 100* here in CT & it sucks.

21 love me?

[24 Apr 2006|12:02pm]
Hey so I know a few of you said you could possibly hold a class for me till my registration status changes to junior- i.e. when my grades go through for this semester- the class I need is MW 11:00-12:50/1, so if anyone is not talking a class on this day and time and has 14 credits or less, would you do me the hugest favor ever and hold one of these classes for me. [ they are all ASL, so it doesn't really matter which one, I just need it during that time. ]  I'd prefer the first one, but any will do. THANK-YOU to anyone who can, I appreciate it soo much.

Full Term  AS CSD  80428 SPA 3612C  005  Basic ASL No Open 19 MW 11:00am-12:50pm PCD 1143 J. Hardman Tampa
Full Term  AS CSD  88794 SPA 3612C  004  Basic ASL  No Open 25 MW 11:00am-01:00pm PCD 1146 M. Tansey Tampa
Full Term  AS CSD  80425 SPA 3612C  001  Basic ASL  No Open 17 MW 11:00am-12:50pm PCD 1145 W. Collins Tampa

8 love me?

APhiO is major love [09 Nov 2005|04:26pm]

Hey Alpha Phi Omega brothers/pledges.. I got bored and thought it would be fun to have a community for our chapter. So I created one! You better all join, & tell everyone that has an eLJay from our chapter to join :D

Join! Join! Join!

1 love me?

[07 Aug 2005|10:40pm]
[ mood | sore ]

btw this is friends only from now on.

So I don't think I can stop writing in here & I like this journal too much to just start a new one. I guess I'll just have to be careful about what I say, which is dumb, but whatever.

I cannot wait to get out of here, one week till my mom, brother & I take the trek down to good 'ole Florida. I miss usf way too much, & this place basically sucks. btw my brother is out of the hospital & is doing so much better :)

I thought I wouldn't have to deal with drama anymore, but yet it's still there. I honestly wish it would all go away.  

Why do I always fall for all the wrong guys. It's weird .. but its always happening. I'm still going out w. Matt, & I like him a lot, but honestly sometimes not having a bf is better, idk this fall might be tough if I meet a lot of cute boys.

Um have a fun last few weeks of summer. xo.


7 love me?

[24 Jul 2005|09:44pm]
I don't think I'm writing in here anymore. I have a new name thing. but I don't know if I want to write anymore or anything. Too many people who have big mouths. idk. whatever. Its time for a change anyways.
3 love me?

love love love [17 Jul 2005|01:10am]
[ mood | loved ]

I freaking love boys ;)

and family. and true friends. and the beach.

13 love me?

[14 Jul 2005|10:19pm]

So another long time inbtwn updates. oh well.

My brother is in the hospital .. yet again. He has pneumonia & an infection somewhere in his body [in his lungs the docs think] He's up @ Yale [which is an hr away] so its hard on us. Its been a good learning experience so far, he's where I want to work, in the PICU. I got to help out with his PIC line among other things, it was cool, but at the same time I thought I was going to pass out, mostly from the dumb mask I had to wear but oh well.

Um my jobs are okay I guess. Basically I go from one job to the next, and either come home & pass out from exhaustion, go online or go to the hospital.

I'm so tired & bored of Conn. I want to go back to Florida so bad, and can't wait till fall semester gets here.

I'm so sick of fake people. I'm also sick of secrets, I wish I could just say whatever I wanted to say, & not have to keep anything from anyone.

I need boys. I miss hanging out w. different college guys. I miss hookups. I miss kissing.

Okay enough randomness.


9 love me?

[01 Jul 2005|12:02am]
I've gained like 15lbs in the past few months. gosh thats horrible :( I mean I don't think i'm fat but I need to lose weight..so my mom and I are like working out like crazy. It definitely feels good tho, I need to get back into shape.

Boys are weird. Matt like wants me to tell him I love him. But he won't say it to me. I'm not going to say it first, it'd probably be weird, and I don't know, I just like it better when the guy says it first. But he was trying to get me to say it for like twenty minutes..geeze like I don't get why he won't just say it.
2 love me?

[29 Jun 2005|11:47pm]
[ mood | hot ]

Wow I haven't updated in 2 weeks. oh well.

umm..nothing really too exciting has been going on.

Graduations. Grad parties. Went to Maine w. my mom, Katie & her Mom, it was fun. Lotsa lifeguarding, getting a sweet tan. Swim team started, gotta love little kids. Lots of shopping for more clothes that I really don't need. oh well. It's hot here. A little too hot. oh well. um I think I love Matt. i don't know tho. hmm. Thats about it. Hope everyone is having a good summer.

1 love me?

two effing months [15 Jun 2005|11:27pm]
[ mood | sad ]

I am so over Connecticut. Its just boring. I want it to be fall so bad. The ONLY good thing right now is i'm getting a sweet tan by lifeguarding so much. I'm  going to be black by the end of the summer.

Florida I miss you..

8 love me?

[10 Jun 2005|10:58pm]
[ mood | hot ]

Florida was sooo much fun. Thanks to my girls for letting me stay with them. Jess, Jen & I went to a hookah lounge. It was awesome, its just a really chill place that we are definitely going back to. I got to see my roommate for next yr, Chelsea, who I haven't seen in 5yrs so that was cool too & I'm way excited for next year. I also got to spend time w. Matt, which was great, I like him so much more than I thought I did. Anddd now back to boring 'ole Connecticut.

2 love me?

[02 Jun 2005|09:53pm]
[ mood | bored ]

Wow its been a while since I've written in here...& thats bc nothing exciting has happened. All i've done is be completely lazy, also occasionally going shopping & last weekend I went to Vermont for a fam. thing.

Anyway .. fabulous news .. my brothers tumors are shrinking & are also dead .. which is great, considering we all thought we'd be losing him back in January.

Anyways...thankgoodness I'm getting out for a few days ... can't wait to see my tampa kids :)

love me?

[18 May 2005|10:50pm]
[ mood | awake ]

Yes you've guessed it...I haven't done ANYTHING exciting since I last wrote.

But anyways I'm coming down to Florida [ more than likely ]  .. 6/5-6/10 .. thanks to Jen & Shawna for letting me stay w. em.  But yeah, I need to get out of this place as much as possible, & what better place to go to than fL :)

5 love me?

errgh my exciting saturday. [15 May 2005|12:30am]
[ mood | blah ]

Matt called me six times today. think he likes me?! hahaha gosh

Went & saw Monster-in-law today w. my cuz .. cute movie. kinda funny.

Erghh so you know your in Bethel, when the most exciting thing you can find to do on a Sat. night is go to Molten Java [a coffee shop] & listen to a bad band, drink watered down beverages, & be surrounded by older ppl or creepy teens. gotta love it. not.

oh and btw the movie Easy is mad weird. [kt & i rented it] <333

2 love me?

life is duLL [13 May 2005|11:07pm]
[ mood | bored ]

"You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of the sudden even though you have some place where you can put your stuff that idea of home is gone." -Garden State  [okay .. atfirst I didn't like this movie, but now I like love it for some reason hmmm]

idk I kinda feel like that is true. Maybe its because I'm missing Florida & USF like crazy. I miss college life, & the new & exciting adventures..meeting new people all the time. I just <333 it. Boring Bethel..erghh..theres not much to do, & idk everyone just seems dull. and I miss Matt like woah. these four months better go by fast. :/

I might get another job, where i'll be working w. cute boys, so hopefully I can meet new kids to hang out w. .. put some excitement in my life.

Also ... my family is on crack. okay not really, but they are just crazy.

So thats it. Its been like a week since I've written in this thing, & i dont have any other excitement going on in my life.

m i s s  y a  f L  k i d s :)

3 love me?

[08 May 2005|11:08pm]
[ mood | content ]

I am so ready to go back to Florida. Reasons why?:

  1. Its effing cold here. I miss the sunshine & warm weather
  2. I miss high-speed internet .. die AOL die.
  3. My family is that dysfunctional
  4. I miss my usfers & matt
  5. I miss freedom

Anyway last night Katie & I went to the end of the hockey game...lotsa hot boys :)  but so anyways, this like 10yo came up to us in this 'pimpin aint easy' shirt, & asks for our # bc hes friends think were hot. And so we were like how old are your friends? and hes like 16....geeze, so we were like were 18 & 19, & then I had to show him my dl to prove it...geeze. but then the boys walk by and they look like they are 14...gross i mean what the heck. but so then we hung out w. katies friend, Rob & some of his friends, which was interesting.

But anyways, this summer I won't be able to comment that much bc dial-up sucks, but no one delete me please. I swear i'll be back inm full-force in the fall :)

1 love me?

USF is love [03 May 2005|05:29pm]
[ mood | sad ]

So I'm really leaving tomorrow morning. My first year of college is over. I don't think I could of asked for a better year.

There were the many ups and downs
.Hard tests and projects.
.The days of procrasinating.
.Rough morning of crew practice.
.The gross bathrooms.
.The food that no one could ever really prefer.
.Boring classes.
.The oddball teachers.
.The homesickness.
.Boys who are jerks.
.Weird cleaning ladies.

But despite the bad things, there were ten times the positive things.
.AWESOME new friends.
.Alpha Phi Omega & my brothers<3333.
.More boys.
.Spontaneous adventures.
.Fun outings.
.Crazy Stores.
.Bethel kids visiting Me.
.Warm weather.
.The beach.
.New Experiences.

Here are some of my favorite pictures from throughout the year.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Anyway, I ♥ all my usfers & cannot wait till next year.

Hope everyone has an AWESOME summer.
11 love me?

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